how to be a man

If you want to be a man, be heart-stabbed. 

Be betrayed and disgraced. 

Be earnest and eager and wager it all on.

Get up. Get sober. Get non-depressed. You will always be depressed.  You will always fail. You are Man. You are your struggle. Remember that peace is also death. Heaven and hell are you in stasis. While you got a day, you got a shot. 

.

the door knocks

At some point the door knocks.

You didn't expect it to, it wasn't invited.

But the door knocks.

You answer. 

You don't.

it doesn't matter.

The door knocks and enters in whatever fresh hell and you are ready or not it's not always up to you you had plans big ones and it had nothing to knocking. You were the one in control. You were the one who knocked. Now it knocks for thee.

K's Dugout on Foster you can't miss it

Midday (let's be honest 930am Thursday)

Men wearing caps. Not talking. Looking. Thinking. 

I could ask what but it's too soon. 

We like old reruns of the Price is Right. Bob Barker had dyed hair. He looks great and kisses everyone back when you could. 

We play along. Bet $5 on the kitchen thingy.  It's fun. We all play with the contestants.  It's weird outside but this is fun.

Robby gave me my earnings of $20 for guessing the 1988 contestant to win. it's just G&T money, I drink another hour